Heeeeeeeeeeeeere's your bailout!

Publicist Howard Bragman confirmed that TV icon Ed McMahon and his wife have no plans to move from their home, which has been facing foreclosure for nine months. Bragman said he doesn't have details about the deal that's allowing the 85-year-old McMahon to stay, but added: "They ain't leaving." Public records show there was a series of transfers of the loans last month on McMahon's house. A Southern California company, Foreclosure Trackers Inc., has taken credit for brokering the deal and say they plan to negotiate a better deal for McMahon. For months, several people, including Lee and Donald Trump, have pledged to help McMahon and save his house.

WP: Whew. Thank God. First the automakers, now Ed McMahon. I hope the gov't has a plan in place to help out the oil companies next, now that gas has gotten "cheap."

In a time of bleak financial news, Bragman expressed hope that the resolution to McMahon's situation served as a good omen. We hope every other American in trouble has the same experience," he said.

WP: Yes, Bragman (ironic name, eh?), I'm sure every other American will have the same experience with Donald Trump and mortgage companies. Thank you for your genuine concern. Now kindly take your legal fees and get the fuck outta my face.