Balls of Fury: the movie

Synopsis: A disgraced former ping pong champion is drawn back into the world of high-stakes underground table tennis to carry out a top-secret mission. Far removed from the rigidly regulated world of professional sports, clandestine ping pong tournaments offer thrilling competition where only the strong survive. There was a time when the mere mention of the name Randy Daytona was enough to make even those most hardened ping pong player cower in fear, but these days Randy has fallen out of favor with ping-pong fans. The former champ soon receives a much-needed shot at redemption, however, when he is recruited by a determined FBI agent named Rodriguez to win a coveted spot in the upcoming underground table tennis tournament and ferret out the nefarious Feng, whose thriving criminal empire has transformed him into a true menace to society.

For me, I would like to know exactly what the studio head was thinking when that pitch was made to him.

"It's like a Fight Club...for ping-pong players!" explained the writer.

"Yes...I LOVE IT!" shouted the executive. "I'm greenlighting that right away! Underground ping-pong tournaments? That's never been done before. It'll blow people's minds and they'll pay millions of dollars to see that. Go get it started! Here's $40 million to start. Oh, and be sure to hire one of the worst actors ever: Christopher Walken. Go to it! Hey...pass me another joint on your way out, will ya?"